My Aging Parents

Why you need a technology road map — and how to get started.

When we see our aging parents struggle with everyday tasks, easy tech solutions are tempting.

Mom has trouble reading small print? Install a magnifier app on her phone. Dad keeps moving out of frame on FaceTime? Buy him a tabletop phone stand. 

But quick fixes often fail in the long run because they focus on isolated tasks rather than the bigger picture.

There’s a better way to make tech work for you and your parents.

What you want is a technology roadmap — a flexible plan that helps your parent stay independent by introducing the right tech at the right time.

Here’s how to get started.

Identify One Goal

The North Star of a successful technology roadmap is a long-term goal that remains important to your parent over time. 

Begin by asking your parent about what is important to them:

• What are the small, everyday things Mom enjoys most?
• What does Dad want to continue doing for as long as possible?
• What keeps Mom connected, healthy, or independent?

For example, Dad’s long-term goal might be to stay connected to his grandchildren, who live in another city. Or, Mom may want to watch her favorite movies, or take afternoon walks in the park.

Create a Working Plan

The idea is to identify technology solutions that support your parent’s goal and can adapt as your parent’s circumstances change. 

Start with an educated guess about how things might change. Consider your parent’s health conditions and history, cognitive health, memory, hearing, vision, and mobility. 

It’s also a good idea to talk with family members and consult health care providers for their perspective.

What is your parent’s current state? What’s likely to change in the next three to six months? And what other changes and developments are possible over the next 12 to 18 months?

In other words: Where are we now? Where are we likely to be soon? And where are we likely to be later?

Here are three questions to ask at least every three months, or if your parent experiences a major health or life event, such as a fall, a hospitalization, or the loss of a spouse.

• What can Mom do independently and what does she struggle with today?
• What will likely change with Mom’s situation in the near-term?
• What if Mom’s situation changes significantly over the long-term?

Introduce the Right Tech at the Right Time

As your parent’s circumstances change, your technology solutions will need to change. Fortunately, there’s almost always another way to get the job done.

Take, for example, Dad’s desire to stay connected to the grandkids.

Now: You’ve been texting photos and videos daily. But it’s getting harder for Dad to see the screen on his smartphone. And he’s starting to show signs of confusion. 

How can you keep him connected to his grandchildren if he can’t use his phone?

Soon: Consider a device with a larger screen like the Echo Show for easier photo and video sharing. 

Don’t have the desire or patience to walk Dad through the steps to see the new images? Get help.

Later: If the day comes when Dad can’t use his phone, use the Echo Show’s drop-in feature so he can see and talk with the grandkids.

Start Small and Keep It Simple

A thoughtful technology roadmap can help keep your parent safe, connected, and thriving while making caregiving more manageable.

Keep these tips in mind:

Stay focused on Mom’s or Dad’s important long-term goal.This goal is the key benefit your tech solution needs to deliver. And it’s the motivation your parent needs to adapt to new tech as their needs change.

Start small and keep it simple! Don’t try to show Dad all the cool things a device like the Echo Show can do. It’s too much, too soon. Just focus on one key function at a time, starting with the one benefit they want most (i.e., seeing pictures of the grandkids).

Practice, practice, practice. Frequency matters. Practice with your parent every time you visit or call. Repetition is the best chance you have for tech to do what your parent expects it to do. Stick with one function until Dad feels comfortable with it. 

Consider the helpers. When Dad’s tech needs require assistance, make sure your choice considers the people who are helping him. That might be you, your siblings, a home health aide, or staff at an assisted living facility. It’s yet another reason that simple solutions are best.

---

​Diane Dagefoerde is an author and care coach whose unique approach saves people time, frustration, and money managing care for their aging parents.